[Review] The Loved Ones

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‘Okay, this film is extreme. There’s a line and this is crossing it … it’s not quite Matilda.’ Kenny Park 2017.

Of course we don’t have the same opinion as our friend above, we just wanted to give you a feel of what ‘normal’ people, who don’t watch horrors as a bedtime movie, feel about this film. We thought very differently, The Loved Ones has all the right kinds of tension, romanticism and obscurity we look for in a horror film. This is nothing short of a fantastic horror!

Lola is a regular teenage girl who has a crush on a boy (Brent). Sadly for him, she’s got some deep rooted problems that no amount of therapeutic intervention will manage, so when he turns her down for the prom, obviously she has some twisted alternative plan to make her own prom. Lola enlists the help of her mother and father, mainly her Dad because her Mum had some hole put in her brain and salt put in the wound so she’s pretty much out for the count. Lola and her Dad kidnap Brent and tie him to a chair. The film then follows the twisted family traditions that tow the line between endearment and purely disturbing.

We are always in awe of writers like Sean Byrne who have the ability to completely rethink a horror film and inject fantastically dark humour which the layman would otherwise completely miss and find ultimately disturbing. We, on the other hand, appreciate the uniqueness and skill involved in creating a fine tuned masterpiece allowing you to laugh in the depths of absolute creepy-ness. Lola helps us with this, in one scene, as she had lovingly put out a spread of fine dining while wearing tacky paper crowns and a disco ball flashed in the background highlighting a homemade prom banner, she shoved chicken in Brent’s face, forcing him to eat it. After initially resisting, then realising by doing this he is only causing more chicken gunk to be on his face, he eats it as Lola says, ‘Is it finger lickin’ good?’ Absolutely hilariously genius.

The relationship between Lola and her father lends greatly to the Oedipus complex. In brief, where Oedipus loves his mother so much he kills his father. The attention to the development of characters allows you to understand their history and build a picture as to why they are as twisted as they are. Robin McLeavy (Lola) and John Brumpton (Daddy) have no boundaries, their character portrayals are top notch and as a viewer you are completely drawn into how disturbing they are. Daddy and Lola really care for each other, this shines through and almost makes their behaviour acceptable and endearing … ?! Well maybe not for us, but possibly for a psychopath.

Xavier Samuel (Brent) was pretty good too, although the most stand out thing for him is his hair. He really should get that cut.

We don’t want to ruin all the small gems in this film, we want you to experience all that it has to offer, and watch it again and again so you don’t miss any of the gold dust.

This film is the ultimate depiction of teenage angst and the best music encapsulates this … check it out!

Check out the Horror Flick Chicks’ Top Picks as this will definitely be featured!

Rating Breakdowns (out of 5!🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡)

Gore                🤡🤡🤡🤡

Suspense        🤡🤡

Hilarity           🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡

Engagement   🤡🤡🤡🤡

Obscurity        🤡🤡🤡

Overall rating 10/10

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